Running a business or building a successful career isn’t easy at the best of times. Neither is raising a family. So, what happens when you’re a single mum too? According to research by Pew Social Trends, less than half of children now live in a two-parent households. With the constant pressure for women to succeed alone at both parenting and their career, it’s not surprising that this can create inner turmoil and frustration for many.
So how do women in business pursuing their career, navigate the judgement, perception and guilt they may experience, while still managing to be the main breadwinner and to enjoy being a mother at the same time?
Single-parent CEO and certified Right Voice for You facilitator, Marja Zapusek understands all too well. She claims “often women are judged and are not seen as equal if they don’t have a ‘proper’ family. They are made to feel that they aren’t good enough, they don’t have a voice or that they don’t have as much impact because they are a working mother. They are also dealing with other people’s perceptions of them and are often treated differently.”
Marja maintains that women should not be ashamed to be single, or of their decision to choose to leave a toxic relationship. She states they should be proud that they chose to act with strength and courage, to make a decision that empowered themselves, and their children, while being true to themselves. Marja advises “Be unashamedly yourself, embrace your talents and recognize that you can handle so much more than you ever thought you could.”
Marja encourages women in business who are facing this issue to take a different and more liberating approach. Here she shares her top strategies to be inspiration to yourself:
No judgement. Judging ourselves only makes things harder, so change your point of view. Be proud of your choices and be prepared to see a different perspective or adopt a new approach. Realize it’s not the end of the world, rather it’s a new beginning with a new set of possibilities.
Break the stereotype. Families come in all shapes and sizes, so be proud of ‘your’ family and create a home that’s loving, supportive and happy.
Be grateful. See yourself and your choices as valuable and make choices from a space of gratitude. Being grateful allows you to create the best situations for everyone concerned and helps you to have a better perspective too.
Ask for help. Giving up control and the idea that you have to do it all on your own is not only liberating, it’s totally beneficial. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or to feel vulnerable; remember if you don’t ask people don’t know you need help.
Empower your children. We often view our children as those we care about and do everything for. Yet, encouraging our children to help out and get involved gives them a sense of value. They feel included and have an opportunity to contribute and not feel like a burden.
Take care of yourself. As mothers we often put ourselves last. Yet it’s important to not focus solely on your child, you must give to yourself first. Your self-care is the greatest gift you can give to yourself. Nurture you, your body and be kind to yourself.
Be an inspiration to yourself. When we have so much going on in our life and time is limited, we tend to think it’s a disadvantage when in fact it’s quite the opposite. Women actually become stronger, more capable, we start stepping up and even more gets done. We often discover a strength within us that you hadn’t realized before. We choose to use our time wisely, to multitask effectively and become more committed to what we want to create and achieve.
These are great tips for any woman that have a business of their own. What other tips would you offer?
Marja Zapusek is an Access Consciousness certified facilitator, Being you certified facilitator and Right Voice for you facilitator. She is also a licensed mediator with a law degree and works in the corporate world as an assistant auditor and CEO of two companies, one accounting and one in self-development. Before finding Access she had tried all sorts of modalities, none of which created any sense of space, lightness, freedom or even much change. Access helped her leave an abusive relationship, create a happy home with her beautiful daughter, have a healthy body and build a thriving business traveling the world – living her dreams and teaching others to do the same. Follow her on Facebook.
